life.

all this change. and decision making, my life lately has been nothing short of monstrous.
its been ridiculously busy, and it still is. i'm just now starting to time manage everything. just now. ugh. i changed my major to General Humanities Education with a Minor in CTS. I am extremely excited about it. i've come to terms with leaving psychology behind ha. lets face it, another 8 years of this? i'm not cut out for that. besides, its what i always played as a kid, i love children and teaching will bring me that satisfaction i've always been looking for. just switching my major gave me a sense of relief and satisfaction.  then i got the news, "the university of calgary doesn't offer general humanities, they only offer specific program education" not music to my ears. so naturally, i cried when i got to work, in the bathroom alone, with the lights shut off. i miss home so much, and everyone there. its was heartbreaking to hear. but i've been thinking about it lots today. and its the best for me to be here. to separate myself from everyone, and develop my own definitive sense of self. to learn, and make new relationships (but NEVER forget the old ones). to have fun, and taken in this experience 100%. i've been trying to push it away so much. i haven't actually given it a chance. besides, being here, i've taken care of myself a lot more. i eat healthy, and live healthy, and workout. my lifestyle is changing. i love the results i'm getting, but i feel like "just a bit more" "30 more minutes" "ahh, i don't need that". i've been more brutal and obsessive. but, i don't know. maybe its good for me? i never had this mentality before. but its benefiting me. we'll see where it goes.